I am deeply moved and so very grateful for all the comments people have left here and on FB and via e mails. My hearfelt thanks goes out to all of you.
I have decided to stop posting. It's been a very hard decision to reach and despite praying I am still unsure as to what will replace it.
My faith tells me something will come, but as to what that is, I still have no idea. Leaving the blog open seems a sensible option and one that at least, honours the wishes of some people.
So, this is it then.
I'm finding words very hard, but I'll leave you with a poem, a prayer, a video blessing and a song of the snow goose.
Goodbye and Blessings Be With You
Gaelic - Slán Agus Beannacht Leacht
Primary Wonder
Days pass when I forget the mystery.
Problems insoluble and problems offering
their own ignored solutions
jostle for my attention, they crowd its antechamber
along with a host of diversions, my courtiers, wearing
their coloured clothes; caps and bells
And then
once more the quiet mystery
is present to me, the throng's clamour
recedes: the mystery
that there is anything, anything at all,
let alone cosmos, joy, memory, everything,
rather than void: and that, 0 Lord,
Creator, Hallowed one, You still,
hour by hour sustain it.
Denise Levertov
Ever Deeper Roots in Love
by Brother David Steindl-Rast
You, from whom we come
And to whom we go,
Unchanging love,
You give us time for change and growth
In this time of great change in my life,
please, give me courage to change and grow
and cheerfulness amidst growing-pain.
Let me take ever deeper roots in love
Make me faithful without clinging
And let me remain faithful in letting go.
Into your hands I lay my life
And the lives of all whom I love.
Amen.
From
Prayers for All People
collected by Mary Ford-Grabowsk from here
Anyone who knows Paul Gallico's beautiful story of the snow goose will understand the words of this song below :- "God Speed - The Snow Goose. "
Silver white
symphony of water,
wind and light
where a saltmarsh meets the sea
sanctuary, sanctuary
Grey and green
the painter's eye sees every hue between
and every brushstroke's reeds or rain,
reeds or rain
ease his pain
Now it's my time,
my turn to hold you
my time,
my turn to set you free
God-speed
Black and white
the mighty wings that never tired in flight
that crossed an ocean
in one bound
brought to ground
Pearl and gold
with violet eyes to fire a heart grown cold
brings her burden
to be healed
to be revealed
My time,
my turn to hold you
my time,
my turn to set you free
God-speed
Black and red
the port aflame,
so many good men dead
with peppered sail and angel's wings
salvation brings
Crimson blue
saltmarsh sunsets
gulls fly through
the snow goose has no tale to tell
just farewell
Now it's my time,
my turn to hold you
my time,
my turn to set you free
God-speed
The words of the above are found in this video below ;- the only version I could find.
The video quality is not the best but the audio is reasonably OK.
The introduction to the song says it is a tragic story but I feel that is too narrow a description. It is sad, but for me it represents the cycle of life, experience, love and letting go, and speaks also of salvation and hope. The snow goose is a Celtic symbol of the Holy Spirit and an especially important one for me.
I don't know why this song speaks so much to me at this time, but it seemed an appropriate one to finish on.