Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts
Showing posts with label humour. Show all posts

A little entertainment

From a transcript of an actual radio conversation between the British and the Irish off the coast of Kerry, October 1998.
Radio conversation released by Chief of Naval Operations 10 Oct 2001and printed in Irelands Issues Mar. 19th 2008.

IRISH: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid collision.
BRITISH: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid collision.
IRISH: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees South to avoid collision.
BRITISH: This is the Captain of a British navy ship. I say again divert YOUR course.
IRISH : Negative. I say again. You will have to divert YOUR course.

BRITISH: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER HMS BRITANNIA! THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE BRITISH ATLANTIC FLEET. WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP.

IRISH: We are a lighthouse – your call.

Heavy

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you and learn from me,
for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.
For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

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The Our Father for Techies




A mother was teaching her three-year-old daughter The Our Father. 
For several evenings at bedtime, the little girl repeated it after her mother. 
One night she said she was ready to go solo.
The mother listened , as she carefully remembered each word right up to the end.
"And lead us not into temptation", she prayed, "but deliver us some e-mail, Amen."

If the Weather is Bad on Bank Holiday Monday

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